Saturday, April 18, 2009
4/15/2009
Tear, today was our last day. How unfortunate that we traded one long night for two weeks off of this class?!?! What were we thinking? Don't get me wrong, the workshop was great, it's just too bad it was the workshop or two weeks of the best class I have ever taken. Ice cream was a great start to today's class. What I took away from this class were lessons I have already known but never really thought about or exercised throughout every aspect of my life. I realized this when we were watching the video of Jim Valvano receiving the courage award. He said to laugh, think, and in short, express your emotions EVERYDAY, and that is something I can honestly say I do every day. The best way I have always thought of life and how to treat others is something I saw in Aladdin as well as other movies. The genie gives you 3 wishes and every wish comes with a catch and you cannot wish for love because your heart is up to you to decide, but it's only when you wish for the happiness of someone else that you truly feel there is no small print, and on top of that it makes you feel great about it. What's meant to be will be, and if you have enough confidence then the genie is really just a metaphor for yourself. You have the power to choose something selfish or something that will be helpful to others. Being selfish is fine at times, but only if we understand that more pros are needed to outweigh a con. Selfishness is a con, so for every act of selfishness I do or anyone does, just to make sure to make 3 other people's days to make up for it. Being a better person isn't hard, it's just that people have become numb to emotions to avoid getting hurt, so when you feel happy, just be happy!! let it all out. I know I do and will continue to do! Feinberg, it would be great to hear/watch your lectures once in a while on a gray clouded day because it helps reassure what we already know but sometimes forget.
4/13/2009
What held most to my mind today was Feinberg's first story about acting on his anger. Although the warning of holding anger in for 48 hours, I would have to disagree with that only on certain circumstances. I think the best time for this anger to be released is when there is an abuse of power authority above you. I held the position for planning special events for my sorority and that year was when our honor board was extremely power crazy. It's incredible what a touch of power can change people into their darker side and I was convinced I would put them back into their place. They put me in a state of confusion when they decided to lie about the consequences about grade standards. They made me feel like a piece of crap for just doing my job and I did my research from our honor board handbook and found out what they said to some of the girls about their grades and going to the dances was completely unnecessary and inappropriate. I quoted it and sent an email to the entire house, which I thought was a bad idea for a little bit but realized afterwards that that's what they needed to put them in their place. I don't regret my decision one bit, and although you might be confused on what I am saying because I can't necessarily tell you what exactly occurred, the main point is that defying authority, even in anger, is perfectly fine as long as you have your own ass covered and you know what you're doing. Keep your cool and prepare for the consequences. I prepared for the consequences and when I told them my side of the story, they had no choice but to agree that it was the right thing to do.
The rest of the class dealt with pain. It was hurtful to see them many types of pains of all of us in the same room. It was a bond that Feinberg had made, a perfect way to end the class. I saw my pain up there and was glad that my name wasn't on it, not because I am ashamed of it, but because I know that if there was a name then people tend to deny a similar pain they can relate to. There were many pains I have dealt with and it helped to keep it anonymous and make it more personal. I read them in my point of view, not someone else's.
The rest of the class dealt with pain. It was hurtful to see them many types of pains of all of us in the same room. It was a bond that Feinberg had made, a perfect way to end the class. I saw my pain up there and was glad that my name wasn't on it, not because I am ashamed of it, but because I know that if there was a name then people tend to deny a similar pain they can relate to. There were many pains I have dealt with and it helped to keep it anonymous and make it more personal. I read them in my point of view, not someone else's.
4/8/2009
Oh the wonderful world of movies, the joy, the fright, the love, the hate, the anger, the betrayal, the fantasy, the perfect world, etc. The solution to a bad day, how to continue a great day, and the ability to find someone to relate, even if it is fiction. I, just as you Feinberg, have been obsessed with movies. I can't fall asleep if a movie just started on tv, and it doesn't help that I didn't have cable at home until just THIS YEAR!! amazing isn't it. Actually, as I'm speaking/ blogging, I am watching a movie right now. I have an odd reaction to movies, maybe I watch too many, but I seem to always forget the endings even to movies I have seen many times. It just has to be a sign that movies will live on forever and maybe endings, actually endings are definitely not the important part of our lives. What happens in between and how we get to the end is the important message. Afterall, some movies leave it hanging, for you and I to decide what goes on. How movies give us this power is incredible. Being able to finish someone else's story. Even if we don't have our lives quite perfectly in tact, there's always a way out, another option, and movies show us that through the eyes of someone else exactly that can happen. I have been able to recall even the songs that are in movies, recognizing the exact voice of characters without even looking at the television, and even if it does seem a little useless or ridiculous I see it as helping me with my memory, recollection, and ability to travel into a movie just by hearing the song. The soundtrack is such an important part because it helps us bond again with the movie even when we aren't watching it. Even before words in movies, there was sound. How movie writers and producers figured out that was the way to connect with everyone else is amazing.
4/6/2009
There are 2 dimensions of decision making: 1) the right decision 2) the need for others to adopt (acceptance)
--> Decision making has always been a conflict between relationship-oriented and task-oriented people, and especially hard for those that value both, like me. I believe that results come out of an effective group, one that gets things done as well as gets to know each other because if you like who you work with then it makes working together more efficient, most of the times. It's when there is a conflict/disagreement that makes it hard to decide what to do and what side to take. I've taken both sides before, and even if voting is considered one of the worst ways for decision making it is however one of the easiest and time saving. Although, what normally happens in group situations I have been is discussion of options and we write them down and then narrow it down by voting. Once an option is taken out then that vote has to go towards another option and in the end one solution arises. If it's between two options then we pro and con both more in depth before making a decision. This just comes down to how persuasive the person can be, and realistically, if someone is more gung ho about their decision then they will lead it and will be able to defend it better than someone who just chose the other solution for the sake of having another opinion.
2) the need for others to adopt (acceptance)
This is where persuasion comes in handy. If I feel strongly about my decision, I make it my goal to convince everyone else of my decision as well because I know if they don't fully commit to my idea and it's the chosen one, then they will continually complain either in front of me or not to my face; both of which would hurt the group dynamic. So in order to avoid this potential hurt to the group, it's best to persuade and have every member accept/adopt the solution.
As for meetings, I just had a presentation in one of my COM classes where we had to hold a meeting, with a conflict, make an agenda, and write minutes and a memo from it. I've been used to using agendas and having minutes from greek life as well as the sales fraternity I am a part of so it really didn't take that much time, but I know how much it helps in meetings. It's natural for people to get off track and that's when the agenda is a life saver, especially when a group has a tendency to get side tracked it's an easy way to get back to the meeting without offending anyone. Minutes is especially helpful not only as a record of what happened, but also helpful for those that weren't present at the meeting to catch up. In my COM class, we had to watch a movie called Meetings, Bloody Meetings.
--> Decision making has always been a conflict between relationship-oriented and task-oriented people, and especially hard for those that value both, like me. I believe that results come out of an effective group, one that gets things done as well as gets to know each other because if you like who you work with then it makes working together more efficient, most of the times. It's when there is a conflict/disagreement that makes it hard to decide what to do and what side to take. I've taken both sides before, and even if voting is considered one of the worst ways for decision making it is however one of the easiest and time saving. Although, what normally happens in group situations I have been is discussion of options and we write them down and then narrow it down by voting. Once an option is taken out then that vote has to go towards another option and in the end one solution arises. If it's between two options then we pro and con both more in depth before making a decision. This just comes down to how persuasive the person can be, and realistically, if someone is more gung ho about their decision then they will lead it and will be able to defend it better than someone who just chose the other solution for the sake of having another opinion.
2) the need for others to adopt (acceptance)
This is where persuasion comes in handy. If I feel strongly about my decision, I make it my goal to convince everyone else of my decision as well because I know if they don't fully commit to my idea and it's the chosen one, then they will continually complain either in front of me or not to my face; both of which would hurt the group dynamic. So in order to avoid this potential hurt to the group, it's best to persuade and have every member accept/adopt the solution.
As for meetings, I just had a presentation in one of my COM classes where we had to hold a meeting, with a conflict, make an agenda, and write minutes and a memo from it. I've been used to using agendas and having minutes from greek life as well as the sales fraternity I am a part of so it really didn't take that much time, but I know how much it helps in meetings. It's natural for people to get off track and that's when the agenda is a life saver, especially when a group has a tendency to get side tracked it's an easy way to get back to the meeting without offending anyone. Minutes is especially helpful not only as a record of what happened, but also helpful for those that weren't present at the meeting to catch up. In my COM class, we had to watch a movie called Meetings, Bloody Meetings.
Saturday, April 4, 2009
4/1/2009
I will become the trim tab. The most necessary asset in any future company I will work for. In today's society, more like America, the stigma of lazy non forward-seeking workers is what I have grown up to go against. Thanks to my parents they have pushed me to be ahead of the curve since I was in the womb. I was born already knowing two languages as I grew up going to school to learn English and the necessary subjects. When I came home, school continued but in different languages. My mother spoke Taiwanese while my dad spoke Mandarin; both are dialects of each other but they share the same written language. It wasn't just languages though, my mom knew that knowledge is what will set me apart and since I was fortunate enough to catch on fast, she just kept throwing challenges to me. While kids in my class were just starting to learn multiplication, I had already finished all multiplication as well as division. It was great to have someone push me so hard. When I got to college, I lost a bit of the motivation as I got sidetracked with all the freedom, but since I was so used to work being a part of my life, homework was a breeze. What I worked on was my social life. Small talk, even today, seems to me as one of the hardest conversations to have. To set yourself apart from the usual 3 is very difficult. The usual 3 I consider is: What's your name, you major, where are you from? Really does any of that matter? Highly doubtful when we are all at the same place now at the same time. What my parents have instilled in me is what sets me apart and what will make me the best damn trim tab for any company I choose to work for and not the other way around.
Today we simulated being deserted with the possible 15 items to rank in order of importance. My score was closer than our groups, but that wasn't because they didn't hear me out. I spoke my mind for the items I knew had to hold some importance and for those I guessed on, I listened to other group members that were more intuitive to survival tactics. I believe we did a great job, and despite if you believe in luck or not, I consider myself to be a pretty lucky person and that helps when I'm guessing. I got the lowest score in my team, but it's harder to convince people to change their choices because of my luck over others that have actual technique and reasoning. Luck will forever be my strength and I will use it to my best advantage.
Today we simulated being deserted with the possible 15 items to rank in order of importance. My score was closer than our groups, but that wasn't because they didn't hear me out. I spoke my mind for the items I knew had to hold some importance and for those I guessed on, I listened to other group members that were more intuitive to survival tactics. I believe we did a great job, and despite if you believe in luck or not, I consider myself to be a pretty lucky person and that helps when I'm guessing. I got the lowest score in my team, but it's harder to convince people to change their choices because of my luck over others that have actual technique and reasoning. Luck will forever be my strength and I will use it to my best advantage.
Thursday, April 2, 2009
3/30/2009
To start today, we looked at PSG running elections and before Feinberg even asked the question of what's wrong with this picture, I already knew. I have grown up as a very independent person. I care for those that care for me and I don't believe that anyone should be restricted to do anything because of what they look like or how they were born. For the past nearly decade, my direct family is what I consider to be me, my brother, and my mom. My parents got divorced when I was 12 and despite still have great relations with my dad, I don't consider him sincerely interested in what is going on in the 3 of our lives. This is where I partially received my "I don't give a shit about you because it's all business mentality", but along with his attribute I also got my mother's "A woman can do anything, and we have emotions for a reason mentality". So it's easy to see that these two sides of my personality may clash at times. I am emotionally there for those that I know and care about, for those that I have some relation with, but many times it's also to strangers. Life has a lot of gray areas and this is one of my biggest gray areas. I have seen how friends and strangers as well can take advantage of a friendship and vice versa, I have seen how strangers and friends can step up to the plate of trust when you need them. A long time ago, my mother told me never to mix friendship with money. Money is a drug and if you want it then you get it yourself, but do not involve your addiction with someone you care about and do not trust someone that looks to you for your "drug". What a crazy life it is that money can sometimes buy happiness? It's true because look at what you can't get if you lack money? Shelter, food, clothing, the basic necessities basically. So honestly, yes, money can buy happiness in the terms of a foundation but not the true happiness most forget to strive for. Back to the class, I am a very woman power type of person. I'm not one to go parade around but I do believe in changing those who feel they are powerless first hand.
A story: my roommate came back with her friend from the cactus a couple weeks back and they were crying their eyes out. Now I hate crying, aside from crying in movies, I really have no interest in crying or those that are crying unless the matter is serious. This was a serious matter, they told me how they were hit by this guy in the back of their head and the other girl got a punch on the side of her head near her temple and he proceeded to pour his drink on her and into her eyes. She returned the favor of the drink pouring and his friend poured his drink on her, so now I have my roommate who just got hit and her friend who is drenched with vodka on her clothes and in her eyes. What now? They said they went to the security and they told them off with the response of "well, what do you want me to do? I didn't see it. You're just overreacting" WHAT?!?!?!? Overreacting they should! and shame on the Cactus for even thinking this was a norm. I asked if they remembered what he looked like, could they pick him out of a crowd? what was he wearing? Basically interrogating them to see what options they had. I have taken self defense classes in high school as a part of the curriculum and it has taught me to remember the specifics because that's all you can count on in the end. Of course, they were a little intoxicated and couldn't remember aside from him wearing a shiny ed hardy shirt. How ridiculous that this abuse is still allowed and taken so lightly. Here's where my independence comes in, I believe that you should have a mentality to never count on others and in this case it was right, the security guards were of no help. I didn't even think about how they could have called the police because really, what evidence did they have? It was not their fault that this fight started, but it was their fault in terms of feeling helpless. It's normal to feel that way in these situations, but that's probably why women have a stigma of being overly emotional and not trusted for high positions. We need to adapt to put feelings aside at the right time to concentrate on the problem.
It all starts with one person trying to provide something they know to another. Then hopefully it will help someone else in the future. It may have been too late to help my roommate and her friend in this situation, but after talking with them about what they should have done if this was to happen again then they could prevent it from happening. Their response before I fully convinced them how important this was was "it's not going to happen again, we're not going back there". My response I very bluntly added was "this is not the last time". This scared them but they realized that sometimes putting a stronger forefront can not only help in these situations but also prevent them altogether. I'm not saying we should act like guys and be almighty and knowing, but in certain situations it is a better outcome than flashing our eyelashes at them.
Now that I got that out of my system, onto the rest of what I thought about class. Communication, it's the most important thing for not only school and friends, but also work and family. All communication is two way nowadays with the ability to ask questions and listen as well. Someone talking and nobody listening is equivalent to no communication taking place, so if you want to communicate effectively you need to learn to listen and also talk about things that will make your listening easy on the ears and want to listen rather than forcing to hear you. This is the more difficult and more time consuming method but the end result is always better, just as we saw in class today. Today's class gave me a flashback of just a couple weeks ago when I went to my second interview for a job. I was interviewing again with the same person and all I could think about what what else should I ask for him to know I'm interested? I don't want to ask questions I can find out myself or that I already know the answer of. This is what I believe the hardest part of any interview is. It's open ground shooting and you don't know where to aim. I finished my interview for what I thought was great, and as I was walking back after the interview with him I asked him a question I believe was the most resounding. "What can I work on?" I was even impressed and I could tell he was too. He was more than happy to tell me and I was more than happy to take it. He said what I could work on for my interview with the next guy in the afternoon and that's exactly what I did. That was the best, most fun, and most rewarding interview I have done thanks to communication.
A story: my roommate came back with her friend from the cactus a couple weeks back and they were crying their eyes out. Now I hate crying, aside from crying in movies, I really have no interest in crying or those that are crying unless the matter is serious. This was a serious matter, they told me how they were hit by this guy in the back of their head and the other girl got a punch on the side of her head near her temple and he proceeded to pour his drink on her and into her eyes. She returned the favor of the drink pouring and his friend poured his drink on her, so now I have my roommate who just got hit and her friend who is drenched with vodka on her clothes and in her eyes. What now? They said they went to the security and they told them off with the response of "well, what do you want me to do? I didn't see it. You're just overreacting" WHAT?!?!?!? Overreacting they should! and shame on the Cactus for even thinking this was a norm. I asked if they remembered what he looked like, could they pick him out of a crowd? what was he wearing? Basically interrogating them to see what options they had. I have taken self defense classes in high school as a part of the curriculum and it has taught me to remember the specifics because that's all you can count on in the end. Of course, they were a little intoxicated and couldn't remember aside from him wearing a shiny ed hardy shirt. How ridiculous that this abuse is still allowed and taken so lightly. Here's where my independence comes in, I believe that you should have a mentality to never count on others and in this case it was right, the security guards were of no help. I didn't even think about how they could have called the police because really, what evidence did they have? It was not their fault that this fight started, but it was their fault in terms of feeling helpless. It's normal to feel that way in these situations, but that's probably why women have a stigma of being overly emotional and not trusted for high positions. We need to adapt to put feelings aside at the right time to concentrate on the problem.
It all starts with one person trying to provide something they know to another. Then hopefully it will help someone else in the future. It may have been too late to help my roommate and her friend in this situation, but after talking with them about what they should have done if this was to happen again then they could prevent it from happening. Their response before I fully convinced them how important this was was "it's not going to happen again, we're not going back there". My response I very bluntly added was "this is not the last time". This scared them but they realized that sometimes putting a stronger forefront can not only help in these situations but also prevent them altogether. I'm not saying we should act like guys and be almighty and knowing, but in certain situations it is a better outcome than flashing our eyelashes at them.
Now that I got that out of my system, onto the rest of what I thought about class. Communication, it's the most important thing for not only school and friends, but also work and family. All communication is two way nowadays with the ability to ask questions and listen as well. Someone talking and nobody listening is equivalent to no communication taking place, so if you want to communicate effectively you need to learn to listen and also talk about things that will make your listening easy on the ears and want to listen rather than forcing to hear you. This is the more difficult and more time consuming method but the end result is always better, just as we saw in class today. Today's class gave me a flashback of just a couple weeks ago when I went to my second interview for a job. I was interviewing again with the same person and all I could think about what what else should I ask for him to know I'm interested? I don't want to ask questions I can find out myself or that I already know the answer of. This is what I believe the hardest part of any interview is. It's open ground shooting and you don't know where to aim. I finished my interview for what I thought was great, and as I was walking back after the interview with him I asked him a question I believe was the most resounding. "What can I work on?" I was even impressed and I could tell he was too. He was more than happy to tell me and I was more than happy to take it. He said what I could work on for my interview with the next guy in the afternoon and that's exactly what I did. That was the best, most fun, and most rewarding interview I have done thanks to communication.
Wednesday, March 11, 2009
3/11/2009
I got a ride to class today from my boyfriend and I tried to convince him to come since he didn't have ANYTHING to do, but he kindly refused. This is a mini mission of mine: I will try to get as many people I can to come to your lecture because they're helpful and not only that, it's a fun way of making people better themselves. We happened to be talking about time management today which was something I've struggled with for a while. I make lists and it makes me feel great to cross things off, but after a few years of doing that I somehow lost the habit and less and less things got crossed off. I know it's not nice to be doing work in class, but I thought that making a schedule for my day while I was in class was a productive one.
What I want to work on: the 4 assumptions:
Body --> as if you were to have a heart attack
Heart --> as if everyone can over hear you (integrity)
Mind --> think your half-life is 2 years and prepare now (invest in education)
Spirit--> One on one communication with your creator
I don't have high religious beliefs so I really don't think the spirit one affected me as much but as for the other 3 I think it's a great way to check myself when I catch myself talking about someone that isn't any of my business or how I put things off another day.
As for the body, I think I have done this very well. I work out, I eat healthy, I value my personal hygiene and take precautions to avoid any problems in my future. I can honestly say this because I have partied out enough with my time here at college. Enough for me to get two ulcers from drinking. This isn't the best way to realize something but once again better late then never. I've been able to speak to people about what I thought was a college requirement, especially to my brother who is now a freshmen and has already gotten a drinking ticket, suspended license, and a trip to the hospital, as well as gotten his fake taken away. Whew, that was a mouthful. I know drinking is going to happen and I'm actually glad he got in all that trouble his first year in college because it took me much longer to understand that it's not a necessity. I still drink, don't get me wrong, but I'm at a point when the future is at hand and friendships aren't considered great if they're just good to go out and blackout with. My brother still drinks and still will for a while, which I understand, but I make it my role as an older sister to tell him what I've learned. Of course, both of us need to experience it ourselves but I hope he never gets to the point of pain I was in when I finally realized I needed to change because I may have affected my health from the two great, fun, and completely blacked out years of my life. Well, onto another topic of the day.
The part I enjoyed most in class was the breakdown of how we spend our time. I have to start off with this though, Sleep is important! Studies have shown it and I believe it. When I sleep more, I am more efficient and alert. I will not sacrifice sleep for work, I will work more efficiently with the time I have awake. That is my priority and the first thing in the class that I have completely disagreed with Feinberg about. Now, hygiene, yes women take longer showering but we are also the ones who value our well being (as a generalization) more than men do. Showering is our own time to cleanse ourselves of the day and while you may think we just take time trying to analyze, it's also our time to think. It's a small getaway everyday to rethink what happened in the day or what we want to make for the rest of our day. As another fact, which can be completely unrelated, women live longer. We also age faster, so sorry if I don't want to be some wrinkled hag that lives to 100, we value our prime as well. My mom is a great example, she's successful and has had two children. She's in better shape than I am and will live to a greater age than I will because of the choices she has mad. What takes so long for women? Well, do you ever wonder why we have such soft skin? It's because we lotion after we shower. I've done it since the days my mom did it for me as a baby and it brings a sense of personal satisfaction knowing that my skin is softer and healthier than 80% of the people my age, even younger probably. I'm not bragging, I'm simply stating that caring for ourselves takes more time but it's worth it! My masseuse has had 37-40 THOUSAND clients, and the first thing he said to me was that out of those people he can honestly say that I have the healthiest softest skin ever. It wasn't in a creepy way, trust me, but it made me smile. What we do that is good to ourselves not only brings satisfaction to us when we know it but also when we are recognized for doing it. So, I'm just trying to say that it's not a crime to spend more time in the shower or on personal hygiene, I'll even let you feel my arm to prove so (as well as your not a creep about it). Last thing I am demoting from our class today, TV and movie time. I can honestly say that I wrote the letters, B.S., in huge caps next to these three things. TV? Ok, I'll give it that it does teach a lot but didn't you also come from a generation that had the tv on all the time? You're used to it and it's great that you've found a way to relate it and be able to relay it to students, but for us? Wow, I grew up with no cable and finally convinced my mom to get it just this past weekend! I know for a fact that I am closer to my family, did work more efficiently, and also put things in perspective better because of not having cable. That's not to say I never watched it, in fact, I was addicted to a few shows in high school to the point that we would have to schedule dinner plans around it (we had a lot of fights about it), but compared to a very close family friend of ours, their kids were glued to cable and I can say they were addicted and reap the consequences. They both wear glasses from watching tv late at night in the dark because they didn't want their parents to know, they have few friends because of it, and their family, well it's nothing near how close ours is. This is why I refuse to believe that more tv is needed. You may have been kidding Feinberg, but I take your lessons very seriously and I was almost glad that my boyfriend didn't come just because of these three "beliefs" of yours.
Now it's different because you may know how to manage your time better with these three obvious factors we disagree on, but what about trying one day to get a full night's rest? Did you know that sleeping early helps you lose weight and gain more metabolism? Sorry, I don't mean to offend you but you have shared with us your hardships with losing weight and I'm just trying to help. What about cuddling with Fran? I bet she'd love to have you fall asleep with her in your arms (she may do that now and I have no idea and please don't be mad at me I'm just trying to give an example to what could change). I have no doubt your relationship is high and strong, but a little test trial would never hurt. I'm not asking you to change how you shower here either lol. I know guys shower differently and I'm not going to argue that. Well, now I'm not sure if it's safe to go back to class after break. I just thought that you give such great advice that you deserve some in return. I cut to the chase and I believe strongly in what we disagree in. I've changed many things in what I do from day to day and for future goals; wouldn't it only be fair if we could do the same for you? Just a thought. Have an amazing spring break! I'm off to Mexico so I may not be back for you to yell at me for wanting to change your life. :)
What I want to work on: the 4 assumptions:
Body --> as if you were to have a heart attack
Heart --> as if everyone can over hear you (integrity)
Mind --> think your half-life is 2 years and prepare now (invest in education)
Spirit--> One on one communication with your creator
I don't have high religious beliefs so I really don't think the spirit one affected me as much but as for the other 3 I think it's a great way to check myself when I catch myself talking about someone that isn't any of my business or how I put things off another day.
As for the body, I think I have done this very well. I work out, I eat healthy, I value my personal hygiene and take precautions to avoid any problems in my future. I can honestly say this because I have partied out enough with my time here at college. Enough for me to get two ulcers from drinking. This isn't the best way to realize something but once again better late then never. I've been able to speak to people about what I thought was a college requirement, especially to my brother who is now a freshmen and has already gotten a drinking ticket, suspended license, and a trip to the hospital, as well as gotten his fake taken away. Whew, that was a mouthful. I know drinking is going to happen and I'm actually glad he got in all that trouble his first year in college because it took me much longer to understand that it's not a necessity. I still drink, don't get me wrong, but I'm at a point when the future is at hand and friendships aren't considered great if they're just good to go out and blackout with. My brother still drinks and still will for a while, which I understand, but I make it my role as an older sister to tell him what I've learned. Of course, both of us need to experience it ourselves but I hope he never gets to the point of pain I was in when I finally realized I needed to change because I may have affected my health from the two great, fun, and completely blacked out years of my life. Well, onto another topic of the day.
The part I enjoyed most in class was the breakdown of how we spend our time. I have to start off with this though, Sleep is important! Studies have shown it and I believe it. When I sleep more, I am more efficient and alert. I will not sacrifice sleep for work, I will work more efficiently with the time I have awake. That is my priority and the first thing in the class that I have completely disagreed with Feinberg about. Now, hygiene, yes women take longer showering but we are also the ones who value our well being (as a generalization) more than men do. Showering is our own time to cleanse ourselves of the day and while you may think we just take time trying to analyze, it's also our time to think. It's a small getaway everyday to rethink what happened in the day or what we want to make for the rest of our day. As another fact, which can be completely unrelated, women live longer. We also age faster, so sorry if I don't want to be some wrinkled hag that lives to 100, we value our prime as well. My mom is a great example, she's successful and has had two children. She's in better shape than I am and will live to a greater age than I will because of the choices she has mad. What takes so long for women? Well, do you ever wonder why we have such soft skin? It's because we lotion after we shower. I've done it since the days my mom did it for me as a baby and it brings a sense of personal satisfaction knowing that my skin is softer and healthier than 80% of the people my age, even younger probably. I'm not bragging, I'm simply stating that caring for ourselves takes more time but it's worth it! My masseuse has had 37-40 THOUSAND clients, and the first thing he said to me was that out of those people he can honestly say that I have the healthiest softest skin ever. It wasn't in a creepy way, trust me, but it made me smile. What we do that is good to ourselves not only brings satisfaction to us when we know it but also when we are recognized for doing it. So, I'm just trying to say that it's not a crime to spend more time in the shower or on personal hygiene, I'll even let you feel my arm to prove so (as well as your not a creep about it). Last thing I am demoting from our class today, TV and movie time. I can honestly say that I wrote the letters, B.S., in huge caps next to these three things. TV? Ok, I'll give it that it does teach a lot but didn't you also come from a generation that had the tv on all the time? You're used to it and it's great that you've found a way to relate it and be able to relay it to students, but for us? Wow, I grew up with no cable and finally convinced my mom to get it just this past weekend! I know for a fact that I am closer to my family, did work more efficiently, and also put things in perspective better because of not having cable. That's not to say I never watched it, in fact, I was addicted to a few shows in high school to the point that we would have to schedule dinner plans around it (we had a lot of fights about it), but compared to a very close family friend of ours, their kids were glued to cable and I can say they were addicted and reap the consequences. They both wear glasses from watching tv late at night in the dark because they didn't want their parents to know, they have few friends because of it, and their family, well it's nothing near how close ours is. This is why I refuse to believe that more tv is needed. You may have been kidding Feinberg, but I take your lessons very seriously and I was almost glad that my boyfriend didn't come just because of these three "beliefs" of yours.
Now it's different because you may know how to manage your time better with these three obvious factors we disagree on, but what about trying one day to get a full night's rest? Did you know that sleeping early helps you lose weight and gain more metabolism? Sorry, I don't mean to offend you but you have shared with us your hardships with losing weight and I'm just trying to help. What about cuddling with Fran? I bet she'd love to have you fall asleep with her in your arms (she may do that now and I have no idea and please don't be mad at me I'm just trying to give an example to what could change). I have no doubt your relationship is high and strong, but a little test trial would never hurt. I'm not asking you to change how you shower here either lol. I know guys shower differently and I'm not going to argue that. Well, now I'm not sure if it's safe to go back to class after break. I just thought that you give such great advice that you deserve some in return. I cut to the chase and I believe strongly in what we disagree in. I've changed many things in what I do from day to day and for future goals; wouldn't it only be fair if we could do the same for you? Just a thought. Have an amazing spring break! I'm off to Mexico so I may not be back for you to yell at me for wanting to change your life. :)
3/9/2009
" We have the resources but lack desire and motivation to be there"
Changing is an ongoing procedure and does not occur overnight unless we are in one of those fairy tales that magically change us from poor to rich, sad to happy, or alone to with someone. Why is it that we need to grow up on fairy tales that make us believe or somehow think in the back of our mind that we will be one of those people? Some magical fairy godmother doesn't come to make everything better. It's up to us. Today's class was centered on improving ourselves, just as many of our classes are.
One of the quotes that stuck with me from this class was that fear of failure leads to us being scared to try. What a bunch of wimps we are. Feinberg, if you read this I think you and my mom were destined to give out life lessons. Both my brother and I were raised to be the difference. That lack of our motivation will be the death of us. Without any drives, we will not achieve anything and for a couple years in my teenage life I actually did not believe this. I slacked off in school, was lazy when I came home and just lacked all motivation because I was used to being smart and catching onto things quickly. Why did it come during my teenage years? Well, that's when I started putting friends and my social life above what I thought was unnecessary and what came naturally. I know I'm smart and I can get things done and during those years thats what I did, just THINK about it and never following through. Homework started to pile up because unlike from before I didn't do my homework the second I got home because the other kids didn't do their homework until later, so by the time I was finished with my homework everyone couldn't come out. I did what I thought was best and adapted to their lifestyles. One day my mom asked, why do you need to do what they do? Why follow when you can lead? Teach them to do their homework when you come home or do it together and that way you're not only making themselves more effective people but also giving a realization to their parents that their teenagers still have the capability to learn. Well, I suggested this and some did follow which was great and I can say that although I didn't have as much fun or even get into as much trouble as my other friends it was obvious that I chose the right path today. I still talk to my friends, the ones that did their homework before play and the others as well, but today, when we're all in different colleges around the world I know who has better grades and still has time to go out. After all, we don't go out until 10:30 or 11 anyways. I've said this way too many times than I thought I would but my mom was right once again. After all she is older and not only that but successful, happy, stable, and constantly learning more despite her 50th birthday coming up.
When I asked what she wanted for her going over the hill, she responded quite offensively, "I'm not even close to half way. Just look at what I've done and I'm not about to slow down now!"
I hope to be just like her and every day when I have a choice between doing something I always think of what she would do. Now, I don't want to be exactly like her and I can't but if I can think the way she does three decades earlier then I can't even imagine what I will be able to accomplish by the time I'm 50. I know I'll be saying the same thing. That's what I want to work towards.
On another note, we watched the story on Liz Murray today and how she went from nothing to Harvard, and once again, I thought still another hardship that made someone rethink their life. But then I realized, there are things that people can't control. Not everyone is born a saint and everyone makes mistakes or as some hardships. The great are the ones who come out of those hardships and become better people, so I'm sorry about ripping on people that had to go through something to become better. I don't know them, they were probably just as kind as before but now they have more motivation to be so.
I went for a massage yesterday because I got a gift certificate from my boyfriend for Xmas and although he said the present backfired (because I got a male masseuse haha) but really it was a nice conversation I had. I found out that Jeff, my masseuse, had survived cancer 3 times (Hendricks disease -- lymph nodes) and I found myself asking him if he had changed from it. A question I would never have thought to ask if I was never in this class. He first asked physically or emotionally? And I said emotionally, because physically is obvious. His reply was no, I was happy with my life before and cancer was just another phase I had to go through. I was only semi satisfied with his answer thinking that he should have said yes because he values life more, but after an hour I got to know him better and it's true, you don't need something to happen, he was genuinely happy before and after. He didn't use his cancer as an excuse, he didn't curse it like many people do, and it was great to meet someone like that. Although my massage was just par compared to what I have had before, I left feeling like I made him think more about his life. I may not go back for a massage, but his company was worth it.
Changing is an ongoing procedure and does not occur overnight unless we are in one of those fairy tales that magically change us from poor to rich, sad to happy, or alone to with someone. Why is it that we need to grow up on fairy tales that make us believe or somehow think in the back of our mind that we will be one of those people? Some magical fairy godmother doesn't come to make everything better. It's up to us. Today's class was centered on improving ourselves, just as many of our classes are.
One of the quotes that stuck with me from this class was that fear of failure leads to us being scared to try. What a bunch of wimps we are. Feinberg, if you read this I think you and my mom were destined to give out life lessons. Both my brother and I were raised to be the difference. That lack of our motivation will be the death of us. Without any drives, we will not achieve anything and for a couple years in my teenage life I actually did not believe this. I slacked off in school, was lazy when I came home and just lacked all motivation because I was used to being smart and catching onto things quickly. Why did it come during my teenage years? Well, that's when I started putting friends and my social life above what I thought was unnecessary and what came naturally. I know I'm smart and I can get things done and during those years thats what I did, just THINK about it and never following through. Homework started to pile up because unlike from before I didn't do my homework the second I got home because the other kids didn't do their homework until later, so by the time I was finished with my homework everyone couldn't come out. I did what I thought was best and adapted to their lifestyles. One day my mom asked, why do you need to do what they do? Why follow when you can lead? Teach them to do their homework when you come home or do it together and that way you're not only making themselves more effective people but also giving a realization to their parents that their teenagers still have the capability to learn. Well, I suggested this and some did follow which was great and I can say that although I didn't have as much fun or even get into as much trouble as my other friends it was obvious that I chose the right path today. I still talk to my friends, the ones that did their homework before play and the others as well, but today, when we're all in different colleges around the world I know who has better grades and still has time to go out. After all, we don't go out until 10:30 or 11 anyways. I've said this way too many times than I thought I would but my mom was right once again. After all she is older and not only that but successful, happy, stable, and constantly learning more despite her 50th birthday coming up.
When I asked what she wanted for her going over the hill, she responded quite offensively, "I'm not even close to half way. Just look at what I've done and I'm not about to slow down now!"
I hope to be just like her and every day when I have a choice between doing something I always think of what she would do. Now, I don't want to be exactly like her and I can't but if I can think the way she does three decades earlier then I can't even imagine what I will be able to accomplish by the time I'm 50. I know I'll be saying the same thing. That's what I want to work towards.
On another note, we watched the story on Liz Murray today and how she went from nothing to Harvard, and once again, I thought still another hardship that made someone rethink their life. But then I realized, there are things that people can't control. Not everyone is born a saint and everyone makes mistakes or as some hardships. The great are the ones who come out of those hardships and become better people, so I'm sorry about ripping on people that had to go through something to become better. I don't know them, they were probably just as kind as before but now they have more motivation to be so.
I went for a massage yesterday because I got a gift certificate from my boyfriend for Xmas and although he said the present backfired (because I got a male masseuse haha) but really it was a nice conversation I had. I found out that Jeff, my masseuse, had survived cancer 3 times (Hendricks disease -- lymph nodes) and I found myself asking him if he had changed from it. A question I would never have thought to ask if I was never in this class. He first asked physically or emotionally? And I said emotionally, because physically is obvious. His reply was no, I was happy with my life before and cancer was just another phase I had to go through. I was only semi satisfied with his answer thinking that he should have said yes because he values life more, but after an hour I got to know him better and it's true, you don't need something to happen, he was genuinely happy before and after. He didn't use his cancer as an excuse, he didn't curse it like many people do, and it was great to meet someone like that. Although my massage was just par compared to what I have had before, I left feeling like I made him think more about his life. I may not go back for a massage, but his company was worth it.
Tuesday, March 10, 2009
3/4/2009
I WILL CHANGE YOUR LIFE!
How could something so intriguing slip our mind? Perhaps at that time we were told this, we didn't look at this class as anything more than just that, a class. The typical sit there and waste time and fake listening while the teacher rambles all while we pay tuition for these so called great professors. Now, I have had some great professors, but I'd have to say that this class and Feinberg has definitely helped to shape what we will become rather than who we are now. The choice is always up to us, what challenges we will attack and goals we will reach, but there's something about life changing personalities and ways of looking at life that would attract anyone to this class. Well, enough brown nosing for the class. I clearly love the class and talk about it more out of class to anyone I can grab their attention than other classes, but onto the class.
Video clips make class go by so much faster and are so much more effective than words and lectures. Today we watched one on franklin covey who turned out was founded or created, something like that, by Stephen Covey who's book we had read and analyzed in CSR 418. I remember reading that book and how much writing I had put into it when I was finally done. I'm not even sure I could read the same book again because it was covered. I will have to remind myself to read that book at least once every decade to put myself in check and realign my goals with where I am. Mental and physical note jotted!
Ok, so today's exercise took me a while to think of. It was to write basically our obituary from a friend, family member, and professor. This is what I wrote:
Family (Mom)- Tinny was and still is the light and joy of my life; we should all be glad that someone as loving and caring as my litter daughter shed sunlight into our lives and made each day a happier one.
(I know this is a little over the top, but I think I knew the point of the assignment before doing it and by writing something more over the top only makes me want it more)
Friend: Tina always had a strong belief in reincarnation and as someone who has grown to love her as much as myself, I am sure she is bringing the same smile, laughter, and strong mind to the next generation she touches.
Professor: Tina was just a student but turned out to be a mentor for not only myself but also her peers with her happy influence and crazy motivation.
(Now this one was definitely the hardest because I am normally very quiet in class and although typically doing well in class it takes me more time than say, Matt in our class. This is something I want to change and why I wrote it, to motivate myself)
After thinking about my funeral, I remembered how I described what I wanted my funeral to be like. The first time I thought about this was when my great uncle, who was a great role model, father, husband, and person overall, was about to pass after his second lung cancer transplant was unsuccessful. He chose not to fight again to get another one, which I really didn't understand when I was young but I definitely can grasp today. (He had lived such a great life, it was someone's way of telling him that it was time to go off and better his next life just as he did this one) When he passed, my brother and I were at school, but I remember going after and watching my mom and great aunt dress him in his nice clothes and put his favorite things beside him. That wasn't the amazing part though, my mom and great aunt did it with HUGE smiles!!! They knew he was in a better place and that he was off to do more good somewhere and we were lucky to have known him. I knew then that I wanted to be remembered like that. I wanted to have my funeral a happy one. I don't want people to cry for me, when I'm gone and looking down I don't need to see my family and loved ones in sorrow but joy. The feeling of happiness because I was around and not that I was gone. Since that funeral, I have always been happy for those that passed. Not in a disrespectful manner but an understanding one. How great it is that I got to witness the passing of my great uncle. It wasn't until now that I've realized what an affect it has had on me. I'm wearing a smile right now just thinking about it. :)
How could something so intriguing slip our mind? Perhaps at that time we were told this, we didn't look at this class as anything more than just that, a class. The typical sit there and waste time and fake listening while the teacher rambles all while we pay tuition for these so called great professors. Now, I have had some great professors, but I'd have to say that this class and Feinberg has definitely helped to shape what we will become rather than who we are now. The choice is always up to us, what challenges we will attack and goals we will reach, but there's something about life changing personalities and ways of looking at life that would attract anyone to this class. Well, enough brown nosing for the class. I clearly love the class and talk about it more out of class to anyone I can grab their attention than other classes, but onto the class.
Video clips make class go by so much faster and are so much more effective than words and lectures. Today we watched one on franklin covey who turned out was founded or created, something like that, by Stephen Covey who's book we had read and analyzed in CSR 418. I remember reading that book and how much writing I had put into it when I was finally done. I'm not even sure I could read the same book again because it was covered. I will have to remind myself to read that book at least once every decade to put myself in check and realign my goals with where I am. Mental and physical note jotted!
Ok, so today's exercise took me a while to think of. It was to write basically our obituary from a friend, family member, and professor. This is what I wrote:
Family (Mom)- Tinny was and still is the light and joy of my life; we should all be glad that someone as loving and caring as my litter daughter shed sunlight into our lives and made each day a happier one.
(I know this is a little over the top, but I think I knew the point of the assignment before doing it and by writing something more over the top only makes me want it more)
Friend: Tina always had a strong belief in reincarnation and as someone who has grown to love her as much as myself, I am sure she is bringing the same smile, laughter, and strong mind to the next generation she touches.
Professor: Tina was just a student but turned out to be a mentor for not only myself but also her peers with her happy influence and crazy motivation.
(Now this one was definitely the hardest because I am normally very quiet in class and although typically doing well in class it takes me more time than say, Matt in our class. This is something I want to change and why I wrote it, to motivate myself)
After thinking about my funeral, I remembered how I described what I wanted my funeral to be like. The first time I thought about this was when my great uncle, who was a great role model, father, husband, and person overall, was about to pass after his second lung cancer transplant was unsuccessful. He chose not to fight again to get another one, which I really didn't understand when I was young but I definitely can grasp today. (He had lived such a great life, it was someone's way of telling him that it was time to go off and better his next life just as he did this one) When he passed, my brother and I were at school, but I remember going after and watching my mom and great aunt dress him in his nice clothes and put his favorite things beside him. That wasn't the amazing part though, my mom and great aunt did it with HUGE smiles!!! They knew he was in a better place and that he was off to do more good somewhere and we were lucky to have known him. I knew then that I wanted to be remembered like that. I wanted to have my funeral a happy one. I don't want people to cry for me, when I'm gone and looking down I don't need to see my family and loved ones in sorrow but joy. The feeling of happiness because I was around and not that I was gone. Since that funeral, I have always been happy for those that passed. Not in a disrespectful manner but an understanding one. How great it is that I got to witness the passing of my great uncle. It wasn't until now that I've realized what an affect it has had on me. I'm wearing a smile right now just thinking about it. :)
3/2/2009
Today we watched a video about Jessica Clements, a girl who survived what could have been a tragedy and came out of it with a gigantic smile and the want to help others. Now, it was an amazing video and woman no doubt and that's all I could think when I was watching the video, but since watching that video it made me wonder, why is it that we all need something horrible to happen to us to cherish what we have and celebrate it? Is it because we would be looked down on if we were just happy for no reason? Looked as if we were weird? Socially unacceptable?
How is it that we allow for people to think their lives are shit and then waiting for something to come around bad to make their lives look more livable because it could be worse. Why do we always wait until it gets worse to be a better us? I feel as an annoying child asking someone older the constant WHY??? Who do we turn to when we're already called adults? when we're older? who do we turn to? The answer is ourselves, we have and need to turn to ourselves. If it's really necessary for something bad to occur before we believe we can be picked up on our feet and help others then we are a sad excuse for the human kind. It says it in the noun we are, human KIND!!! we were made to be kind to ourselves and others. We are all born with the ability to help others and ourselves.
Now, back to Jessica Clements, I am not saying she wasn't a good person who didn't do any good beforehand. Clearly she defied this, my point was why it is so rare to hear of a story of a good person doing more good?!?!?! Does this make sense to anyone? Does this wake anyone else up? Or am I just going to be looked at as some crazy person willing to help strangers without something bad happening to me? Just as we heard in class, in order to change ourselves, we need to change the environment of our life!!!
Onto the topic of the day, Cohesiveness. I was one of the three fortunate enough to stand in the front of the class (thankfully with my two good friends) to do the chinese finger trap task, which we failed the first time. We just assumed a task and did it in quite the impressive time I think, but we avoided the task, which wasn't even stated. But what was wrong with us doing that task? Despite our inability to get a task to complete, we all combined cohesively and performed the same task together! Even with the finger traps out of our hands we were still one, we would defend each other and listen to each other regardless of being attached.
For the second task, I was to lead a group of about 10 to the back door, touch it, and then turn around. I will admit, I just jumped quickly and led the team but the team lacked direction and just played follow the leader. When I caught onto this, which was about when I touched the back door, I told everyone that the team goal was to walk to the back door and touch it then come back. That is how the last person in my team knew what it was. Although delayed, in a way it was better late then never. If I had to do this or any assignment involving a group I will definitely inform them what the goal is prior to any actions. I do it religiously in all my group work but somehow this task slipped my mind as parallel to group assignments and other group work.
We ended the class by singing a song. There's no better way to put a smile on everyone's face than to make us sing together. If you make us sing individually then I'm not sure we would be safe on a stage any longer but as a group, a team, a class, we feel together and not alone, not singled out as usual, and that's what puts a smile on our face. Just as in the football tug: "The only change we get is when we pull for each other" and that's just what we did, even for something as simple as singing. It made a monday less ordinary and more memorable for sure!
How is it that we allow for people to think their lives are shit and then waiting for something to come around bad to make their lives look more livable because it could be worse. Why do we always wait until it gets worse to be a better us? I feel as an annoying child asking someone older the constant WHY??? Who do we turn to when we're already called adults? when we're older? who do we turn to? The answer is ourselves, we have and need to turn to ourselves. If it's really necessary for something bad to occur before we believe we can be picked up on our feet and help others then we are a sad excuse for the human kind. It says it in the noun we are, human KIND!!! we were made to be kind to ourselves and others. We are all born with the ability to help others and ourselves.
Now, back to Jessica Clements, I am not saying she wasn't a good person who didn't do any good beforehand. Clearly she defied this, my point was why it is so rare to hear of a story of a good person doing more good?!?!?! Does this make sense to anyone? Does this wake anyone else up? Or am I just going to be looked at as some crazy person willing to help strangers without something bad happening to me? Just as we heard in class, in order to change ourselves, we need to change the environment of our life!!!
Onto the topic of the day, Cohesiveness. I was one of the three fortunate enough to stand in the front of the class (thankfully with my two good friends) to do the chinese finger trap task, which we failed the first time. We just assumed a task and did it in quite the impressive time I think, but we avoided the task, which wasn't even stated. But what was wrong with us doing that task? Despite our inability to get a task to complete, we all combined cohesively and performed the same task together! Even with the finger traps out of our hands we were still one, we would defend each other and listen to each other regardless of being attached.
For the second task, I was to lead a group of about 10 to the back door, touch it, and then turn around. I will admit, I just jumped quickly and led the team but the team lacked direction and just played follow the leader. When I caught onto this, which was about when I touched the back door, I told everyone that the team goal was to walk to the back door and touch it then come back. That is how the last person in my team knew what it was. Although delayed, in a way it was better late then never. If I had to do this or any assignment involving a group I will definitely inform them what the goal is prior to any actions. I do it religiously in all my group work but somehow this task slipped my mind as parallel to group assignments and other group work.
We ended the class by singing a song. There's no better way to put a smile on everyone's face than to make us sing together. If you make us sing individually then I'm not sure we would be safe on a stage any longer but as a group, a team, a class, we feel together and not alone, not singled out as usual, and that's what puts a smile on our face. Just as in the football tug: "The only change we get is when we pull for each other" and that's just what we did, even for something as simple as singing. It made a monday less ordinary and more memorable for sure!
Tuesday, March 3, 2009
2/25/2009
Sometimes coincidence is seen as two events that are completely unrelated to align, but today I coincidence was a way to beat in the idea one more time. In the same day, two of my professors as well as in my group presentation for a communication class involved the word COHESIVENESS. What is it about this word that makes it relative to each class and of different majors as well? It is interesting to note that Selling & Sales, my major, and Communication, my minor, both have so much in common.
Cohesiveness in a group, a company, as a culture, etc. are all different ways to represent how effective these social environments really are. Even in families, certain cultures show more cohesiveness than others which in turn are mostly those who care about cohesiveness in the work place. In every situation, when cohesiveness fails, a part of the team crumbles and starts to fade, but those that can catch that crumble before it even begins to slip is how great leaders are made. Every crumble a person saves, their leadership as well as the entire group's strength will grow.
Our group was made up of so many different types of people and we all had contributed some effort in creating our tower; a tower we were proud of regardless of a score. Our leader asked if everyone liked our tower before we brought it back in the room to judge and we all agreed not knowing that unconsciously we already won in our own terms. Of course we shouldn't just stop there in the work place, but when there is a lack of information or in this case time, then the next best thing is to be confident. If we lack confidence then we gave up the competition altogether. We, as a group, have become a family with contact on a daily basis as well as equality and democracy.
Cohesiveness in a group, a company, as a culture, etc. are all different ways to represent how effective these social environments really are. Even in families, certain cultures show more cohesiveness than others which in turn are mostly those who care about cohesiveness in the work place. In every situation, when cohesiveness fails, a part of the team crumbles and starts to fade, but those that can catch that crumble before it even begins to slip is how great leaders are made. Every crumble a person saves, their leadership as well as the entire group's strength will grow.
Our group was made up of so many different types of people and we all had contributed some effort in creating our tower; a tower we were proud of regardless of a score. Our leader asked if everyone liked our tower before we brought it back in the room to judge and we all agreed not knowing that unconsciously we already won in our own terms. Of course we shouldn't just stop there in the work place, but when there is a lack of information or in this case time, then the next best thing is to be confident. If we lack confidence then we gave up the competition altogether. We, as a group, have become a family with contact on a daily basis as well as equality and democracy.
Friday, February 20, 2009
2/18/2009 -- Tower Building
When a person/ leader holds more power in terms of information of a task an interesting thing occurs. The team naturally strive to understand and quickly, since it was time constrained, all shoot out ideas and follow through after some approval either from other team members or the leader himself. Yes, I am describing how most groups work for classes but also in the work place. There will always be someone that knows more than you and by getting that straight in your head will be able to help lower anyone on their high horse. Yes the leader in our situation knew more than our team, but still other team leaders seem to get a slightly different message. This is important because When information is given multiple times it is similar to the game telephone, either something is added because it was forgotten previously or something was omitted, which all ends with a different interpretation of the message. The ideal situation is to be able to understand and receive the message as well as relay it to your team as it was specifically as possible and then we move on from there. Since there was so much leeway with our tower building, our leader brought the main tools for building the foundation of our tower and asked each of us to print out a picture of ourselves having fun. By adding personal touches to the tower it made us feel as a team with all our inputs heard and more blatantly apparent on the actual tower. I believe ours represented our team very well because we worked together and pulled each other's strengths to offset any weaknesses. Ideas were thought through and given multiple suggestions for improvement. Since we could not have everyone working on the actual tower, we split into two groups: creative and foundation. The foundation being the tower structure and the creative being the design team. We did not just split the groups randomly but said if you are better at decorating then please help the creative team and vice versa for the tower structure. Having only a short amount of time, I believe we handled our timing very well with time to spare for clean up and for moving the structure inside the room. It was interesting to see the other towers and how they were presented. Although, I believe there were towers that would have received higher marks if the presenter was personally more excited or elaborate on their descriptions. This was their chance to tell the class about the team and the last group, who won, did it very well in making sure everyone participated in the tower by showing their support system and being able to describe their actions.
Saturday, February 14, 2009
Kirk Weisler
I heard only good things about the workshop from previous students so the 5 hours didn't seem like it would be torture. Turns out the night was not only interesting but inspiring and fun! The emphasis on how things and people in your life can and are a huge part of a person's motivation and their choices was a breath of fresh air compared to the other professors I have that emphasize how their class will be used in all walks of life after we graduate. Although I do not doubt I will use many things I learn in college for the rest of my life it is definitely not to the extent of csr 309, which not only tells you what we should and should not pay attention to during class but for the rest of our lives. I really enjoyed the activity and I showed my roommates and friends after we got back that night and it was quite amusing trying to tell them how this exercise was to show how flexible we are when we get stuck in a problem. They all understood the message but could not seem to implement it which was intriguing. (With a little help they all got it). I emailed a thank you letter to Kirk because I was/am in the same situation about reading except I've taken the first step of purchasing the books but never seem to find the time or make excuses to avoid reading them. Kirk emailed back with a couple more selections on top of the 20 he gave that night that were more short reads and would be a good start. I was lucky enough to have had a ride after the workshop was over since it was pouring out and the funny thing was my friend was debating to start reading their book for class now or wait yet another day. Of course, my gung ho reaction was to "DO IT TONIGHT! If you keep putting it off you never know when you're going to get it done. We just had a night on taking the initiative and how that will set us apart from others and help get an upper hand on things....etc......" As this went on their face turned to the "where is all this personal power coming from" face and decided I was right. It felt good to spread a part of what I had just gotten out of the workshop in a few minutes.
Friday, February 6, 2009
2/4/09
Today's leadership selection process was quite interesting. The first two groups, despite receiving specific instructions on what NOT to do, continued to converse without including the rest of the class. This showed a kind of norm of how leaders are today, filled with secrecy and sense of superiority. At times, this may be the case, but in order to receive full credit from your followers, we need to see what the leaders were doing. The third group was extremely successful in not only keeping us entertained, but also by showing us leadership rather than telling us what leadership meant. It was great to see everyone working so closely and efficiently with each other and a couple leaders stood out during this round, but since the leaders were so effective in creating a positive energy for all the leaders of that round, I gave them all the equal amount of points because as a whole they worked as a unit rather than individuals. The ability to make others as well as yourself look good is ten times harder for those that are selfish, even slightly. A leader needs to be selfish, but for their group, not for him/herself. Another aspect of what I learned of class today was to think outside the box because it already catches the attention of the audience; by adding humor into the mix created an even more successful outcome. There may be rumors on how the last group was "notified" of what was going on previously, but they still came up with their own way of showing/teaching leadership.
Tuesday, February 3, 2009
2/2/2009
It was great to start today's class off with the Superbowl commercials since it is not only fun to watch again but it was also fresh in our memories from the night before. Personally, the CareerBuilder one was my favorite because it was not only funny but inspirational to show those who settle that there is better, that we can always do better, but it is ultimately up to us to use those resources. I have never considered to leave my resume out in the open after finding a job, but now I think it's a great way to stay competitive and alert of what else there could be.
The leader spotlight speeches went very fast but it was also very beneficial to find out what aspects of personality, gestures, speech, and overall appearance of a person could sway my decision as to whether or not they were worth following or to even be a leader. I found many attributes that were consistent with how well I was ranking them: posture, amount of filler words, if they spoke about teamwork rather than what they did, experience different from the norm, eye contact, confidence: in their voice, their stance, their gestures, etc., and how persuasive they were. It was a good sign of a leader to me when the fact of standing in front of the blinding bright light did not even phase them one bit. This was a small but easy way to see how certain people would react to their environment and be shocked or those who simply foresaw and anticipated it prior to getting in there (that was only a few seconds). This little detail helped decipher those who come prepared more than others, who adapt to their surroundings, and those who hold strong even when they are put in a situation in which makes them uncomfortable. Today was quite interesting because of that.
The leader spotlight speeches went very fast but it was also very beneficial to find out what aspects of personality, gestures, speech, and overall appearance of a person could sway my decision as to whether or not they were worth following or to even be a leader. I found many attributes that were consistent with how well I was ranking them: posture, amount of filler words, if they spoke about teamwork rather than what they did, experience different from the norm, eye contact, confidence: in their voice, their stance, their gestures, etc., and how persuasive they were. It was a good sign of a leader to me when the fact of standing in front of the blinding bright light did not even phase them one bit. This was a small but easy way to see how certain people would react to their environment and be shocked or those who simply foresaw and anticipated it prior to getting in there (that was only a few seconds). This little detail helped decipher those who come prepared more than others, who adapt to their surroundings, and those who hold strong even when they are put in a situation in which makes them uncomfortable. Today was quite interesting because of that.
Saturday, January 31, 2009
1//28/09
Today's evaluation had a lot to do with leaders vs. followers. I have seen myself as both and agree that both are necessary for the other to exist, similar to the chicken and the egg situation. What is true that we learned today in class was the ability to decide which type of leader of follower to be, once that is forced (hence Eeyore) or the latter who makes the best out of the situation and commonly makes it a better environment for everyone else (aka Tigger). Our class today began a bit more leadership from the leaders who chose to speak up and walk to the front of the classroom. I will be honest, I was not one of them, and not because I was scared nor thought it was too much work. I will work just as hard as a follower, but the reason is because I believe that a person should be versatile from being a leader to a follower. Not all of us can be leaders just as Dr. Feinberg said because the leaders need followers as well and I believe after watching a few of the people I would greatly trust as a leader that I would be more effective as a follower in that situation. Sure this seemed cowardly or excuse-worthy, and I will agree that if I were to go up there I would have wanted to see who would like to follow to make the most productive team. I believe it took as much guts to give up my own leadership as it was for someone to stand up there. It is all for the good of the group.
Monday, January 26, 2009
1/26/09
Today's class was incredible. I've never seen so many college students move emotions from thoughtful to an entire class load of laughter from one second to the next. In class, all of us were paying attention and despite Dr. Feinberg stating he was a bad leader, he definitely caught our attention which is the first step of a good leader as well. I do not believe the bad leader role is intended for us to be mad, frustrated, or confused, but rather to solve our own questions with a little bit of thought. For other classes, we often ask the professor in case of getting the main point wrong, but that isn't what the real world will be like. Seeing as most of us are seniors and graduating this Spring, the point of this class is mainly leadership that we will experience in the next couple decades of our lives. Seeing what not to do is one of the easiest ways to teach and to learn and it could definitely be said about leadership. When we graduate, we won't have grades or someone to answer our questions whenever we want them, but there will be choices and many more than we have now. We choose to go to class and most do, but some may do it because they paid for it or their parents paid for it, or just that they have to get the grade to graduate, but when we do graduate, depending on what field of work there may be more bad leaders than good and it's up to us to make the best out of the situation. Once we've mastered a bad leader, then I'm assuming we can do much with a good leader. Today's class with the many clips reminded me of the movie Pay It Forward and was more on leading your life the right way which will eventually trigger the right decisions of many more people to come.
After class was over, many people were parked in the parking lot and it was amazing to see how one hour of class on leadership resulted in more courteous drivers. I never once heard tires screeching, horns honking, or even any sudden emergency stops. Everyone seemed more calm and chivalrous. If this is what happened after an hour, then I can't wait to see what happens after a semester. This was one of the highlight days of class so far.
After class was over, many people were parked in the parking lot and it was amazing to see how one hour of class on leadership resulted in more courteous drivers. I never once heard tires screeching, horns honking, or even any sudden emergency stops. Everyone seemed more calm and chivalrous. If this is what happened after an hour, then I can't wait to see what happens after a semester. This was one of the highlight days of class so far.
Thursday, January 22, 2009
1/21/09
It was a shame to yet again miss our Professor, but it was nice to sit back and relax to enjoy The Queen. I have taken a few notes but it normally takes me the second time to really think of great things to write about it. I, along with a couple others, are gathering together next week to watch the movie and really go in depth to what leadership was shown or lack there of in the movie. This will be a great way to not only watch the movie again but also be able to communicate different ideas with other people in the class as well since it was hard to do in class. We will also be able to pause the movie and rewind it if we need.
Saturday, January 17, 2009
1/17/09
The first week of class was definitely different from all my other classes. Honestly, I was told about what this class would be like beforehand. I understand that the lack of leadership shown in the beginning is to show how bad leadership can effect multiple groups of people and individuals. I really did not enjoy the infomercial on the first day of class because I believe that although some people need to watch those to increase their self confidence and also to enhance their motivation to do what they want done, sometimes people need to learn from their mistakes too. I've seen a lot of people that have been at their worst and come back better than before because of their will and determination, both of which are important for leaders to uphold.
- During the second day of class, I'll be honest, I was one of the 14 people that walked in late because I didn't allot time for parking. When I came in, groups were already being formed and there seemed to be some leadership going on from my point of view. I knew from previous classes that groups needed to be formed with leaders, but I thought the leaders were chosen after making a speech to see who they could convince to follow them. The people that stood up and put themselves as leaders were great to have and typically they are the same people from past classes and organizations that I saw stand up to lead before. From the primary task we had, our group discussed it together and we honestly didn't know what it quite meant. We disputed if it was really what was going on in that room or if it was on how leadership in our country today was being done and to study about what is going on with that, especially with the leadership changing hands in 3 days.
- Overall, I think that this class will be very beneficial because we are so used to following very particular schedules and such and this class will allow us to pay more attention. For example, I checked the morning of our first class for assignments and read through the entire thing and listed down all the due dates. Also, checking the assignments because they were not ordered chronologically, which is fine. In the real world, we will not be getting a "syllabus" of what to do for the next 16 weeks on the job and dates will be flying at us in all directions so it's good practice.
- During the second day of class, I'll be honest, I was one of the 14 people that walked in late because I didn't allot time for parking. When I came in, groups were already being formed and there seemed to be some leadership going on from my point of view. I knew from previous classes that groups needed to be formed with leaders, but I thought the leaders were chosen after making a speech to see who they could convince to follow them. The people that stood up and put themselves as leaders were great to have and typically they are the same people from past classes and organizations that I saw stand up to lead before. From the primary task we had, our group discussed it together and we honestly didn't know what it quite meant. We disputed if it was really what was going on in that room or if it was on how leadership in our country today was being done and to study about what is going on with that, especially with the leadership changing hands in 3 days.
- Overall, I think that this class will be very beneficial because we are so used to following very particular schedules and such and this class will allow us to pay more attention. For example, I checked the morning of our first class for assignments and read through the entire thing and listed down all the due dates. Also, checking the assignments because they were not ordered chronologically, which is fine. In the real world, we will not be getting a "syllabus" of what to do for the next 16 weeks on the job and dates will be flying at us in all directions so it's good practice.
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